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Hey ya'll

So we haven't really been blogging lately.. because... sleep. Sleep which was once gloriously a pretty regular and wonderful part of our lives... is now more like a passing friend who comes to stay occasionally..in the spare room.

Yes. I am so tired my analogies don't even make sense.

This week I was that sort of tired where basic human functions seem incredibly difficult. ie.. not dropping whatever is in my hand, walking through a door without hitting the side, remembering my baby has a different name to my preschooler. Those kinds of things.

And shouting.

I've been shouting.

I remember when my first girl was a baby I was really secretly smug about not being a mother who yells...

Ugh, those mums who yell. Why don't they just communicate in a calm loving way? Why don't they use a lovely sing song voice like me? Look at the lovely way I talk to my child.

Oh how the mighty have fallen!

I now have a house FULL of emotionally intelligent, tired females (and one very patient male)! And I don't know who throws the biggest tantrums, but I'm pretty sure my internal rage tops all of them put together!

How I looooong to go back to the lovely mum I used to be...
but she and her singsong voice can't come to the phone right now. BECAUSE SHE'S DEAD TIRED.

I have had so many moments of feeling guilty that I'm much less Mary Poppins and much more Abby from Dance Moms....

But guess what.

I've had an epiphany.

I'm human!

I'm a human mum, raising human children.

And humans lose their temper. (well most of them... well all the creative ones...well all the tired creative ones who are running late to dropping their children at school).

And today after I shouted about something to my daughter. I stopped and looked and her. And she looked at me. And we both started laughing.

And I asked her why she was laughing..and why she wasn't upset with my yelling... and she said..

"It's just silly when you yell, because I just know you love me so much"

OOOOOOH MYYYYYYY WOOOOOORD. This Kid!

She gets it. I make sure I am always quick to say sorry when my anxiety gets in the way of my communication. or even just regular plain old stress. Or tiredness.
In our house it is A OKAY to make mistakes. And that includes us as parents.

And the more I think of it (even though I still don't want to be someone who shouts often) the more I think being truthfully flawed in front of our children is life giving to them. And to us.

It gives them permission to be flawed themselves.
It gives them permission to get it wrong sometimes.
It shows them though our behaviour, our moods and our mindsets change.... our love for each other is constant.

And when we can take a moment to laugh about it. It shows we don't take ourselves too seriously.

And that laughter is the best medicine.

I love my children more than life itself. (Particularly because right now they are asleep). And if I can spend all of my days alongside them simply being authentic in who we are, the good, the bad and the ugly.. and through it all laughing our heads off at our own imperfections... then I have lived a very very good life. And I am grateful.

So let's all wash away the mistakes of the day by finding someone or something that will give you a blimmin good laugh.

And a wine. Happy long weekend!

Xx Michal











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Lets be honest I am very fussy about the programs I let Joseph watch.

First of all, French kids program are simply banned!!! I haven’t came across a program with children that can actually talk to a human being with a even a minimum amount of manners. Some people think Peppa pig is bad... oh dear don’t watch those French programmes!

What else?

Anything with simple computer drawings, typical adult voices that we hear in every kids program or music using awful fake midi instruments, are avoided in my house. 
I know this is tough!! 


Entertainment should lift up our spirit , inspire us.

I was reading on a health website 
"People perform at their best when they are inspired and motivated. These people care to do things right and deliver well. Studies show that people are more likely to climb up the corporate ladder or succeed in any venture when they are motivated and inspired. These two elements are proven to bring out the best in people."


I know I am going quite deep for just a childrens program but I guess this is where I put my value.
I love to entertain. I am just passionate haha.

It is really hard to find a program that is not having at least one of them BUT there is this sweet Irish show that you can find on Netflix called PUFFIN ROCK


 PUFFIN ROCK


What I love about this program:


The story: It is a sweet show about a pufflin big sister Ooona and her little brother Baba learning along with their friends about nature. They are all learning how to live together, encouraging one another knowing what they are capable of and not. 

The drawings: The colours are so rich and tasty and the drawings are full of cuteness.

THE MUSIC, aaaaaaah the music, full of catchy sweet melodies played by real instruments! My ears are just telling me hmmmmm yummy!! haha

And there is more 

The story is narrated by Chris O’Dowd,  and this is giving a pretty funky side to the show.
To be honest I didn’t know him before watching Puffin Rock, but I did think that the narrator was quite funny and was doing a pretty fine job. Then Michal told me that he was an actor on a show called IT crowd, I got curious and had a look…I have never laughed like this for a very long time and now I would never look Puffin Rock the same way haha.

But overall I recommend that show more than a %100 it is stunning, delicious, tasty rich… and they deserve big attention.

Here is the trailer of the season 2, enjoy:





 xx Emma
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Have you heard of Kiwi Kids Music?  It's a collective of New Zealand Childrens Music artists lead by none other than living legend Suzy Cato!

I grew up watching 'You & Me' and 'Suzy's World' after school and was somewhat star struck the first time she emailed us about the Kiwi Kids Collective. I may have squealed. 

In the weekend we had the absolute pleasure of finally meeting Suzy in person! Not only has she not aged a day (see below!) but she was just as inspiring,warm and wonderful as all of you would have imagined growing up! 




It was such a pleasure to be part of this Kiwi Kids Music catch up! Sharing stories, brainstorming and comparing our creative highs and lows was so encouraging. This is such an awesome collective of musicians who as passionate about entertaining, encouraging, teaching and inspiring the youngest people in our beauty country through music.

Petite Music Box, Kahuna Kids Music, Itty Bitty Beats, Kath Bee and Suzy Cato


If you don't already follow Kiwi Kids Music on facebook then make sure to jump over to the page now and connect your children with the music of Aotearoa.




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Petite Escargot
La Video



It is finally out on Youtube !! It was quite a long process to make this video I must say.
First of all, It was hard to make a final decision on how the little Escargot should look or what we wanted the background to look like. By the end of many drawings I didn't really know what I liked anymore!! Oh Dear

One of the Little Snail version I draw

Then, finding time to actually take some pictures (without a tripod!! WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!). I spent a whole afternoon taking pictures, to finally find out that I couldn't use them because doing stop motion video without a tripod is just.... what is the word.... STUPID!!! haha
I also had to go back and forth between rooms so many times to make sure that my son wasn't gonna play with Monsieur Snail. 
But it is out now 
Enjoy 😉



Don't forget to subscribe on our youtube channel if you want to see more videos
You can find Petit Escargot on our Nursery Rhymes album for sale on
Itune https://itunes.apple.com/nz/album/nursery-rhymes/id1156642896
and
Bandcamp https://petitemusicbox.bandcamp.com/album/nursery-rhymes


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Sanity.

How good is sanity!

Well I can tell you... it's flippin good.

I know this because I temporarily lost mine a couple of weeks ago.

The sanity thief? Simply lack of sleep. Extreme lack.

Clementine was born in the morning after I laboured through the night. The following night I had a couple of hours of sleep.. maybe. The next night I had less. The next night I had less...and so on.. until I was getting none. Not even when Clementine was sleeping. Not even if I was sent to my room with someone else looking after her. Not even though I was painfully and desperately tired. I just could not sleep.

Then I started to have panic attacks. Any time I TRIED to sleep my limbs would all floppy and tingly, my mouth would go numb and my tongue would feel too big in my mouth, and I would look at the time and hyperventilate and become hysterical.

And then it crept into almost every moment of the day. On the worst day. My fingers were tingly or numb, my whole face felt numb and panicked anxiety gripped me if anything slightly stressful happened... one of the girls crying, being asked a question, making a decision (like what kind of hot drink to have) or even talking about how I was feeling. I couldn't breathe normally.

Thankfully this wasn't my first rodeo.

This had happened when I had my firstborn. Except then it was the first time, and I was scared out of my mind. That time, I had no idea what was happening to me. Anxiety is terrifying..it not only attacks your mind but your whole body so you can feel like you are completely falling apart. And it can happen so quickly.

At least this time I knew what was going on.

The part that upset me the most about it this time is that I felt like I was being robbed of these first weeks being beautiful and special. You look forward to these newborn days for 9 months, and you know how fast they go... I was heartbroken in feeling I was missing out.

My mum assured me in this time that I would look back and still see all the special moments.

And she was right. I already look back now and still see the intense crazy beauty of the first two weeks.

It took two nights taking a sleeping pill while my husband looked after Clementine and my mum took the older girls to her house, and I regained sanity.

Phew.

I am so thankful I have this support. And to live in a country with midwives and doctors easily accessed to make this just a simple fix. Because it was a simple fix. But without it I have no idea what condition I would be in right now.

I wanted to write this in case anyone else has gone through, will go through or IS going through anxiety post birth. Because anxiety makes you feel like failure, like a bad parent, like a loser... but I want to say.. NOPE... you are fabulous... take all the support you can get and know that you will come out the other side! And tell your midwife/go to the doctor. It can feel like it's all in your head and really weird and you don't know how to talk about it. But talk about it. Because it might not actually take too much to get better.

So here I am now. Tired... but reasonably together.

Clementine is three weeks old and is the most delightfully peaceful little girl.

And thank GOD because the other two little girls living in this house are crazed dictators that lure you in with sweetness and smiles then work you to the bone with their endless lists of demands.

Anyone who tells you 'going from two to three is easy' with a casual hair flick... are LIARS! Don't let them fool you! Make them look you in the eye when they say it. Look for the telling twitch of the lip that lets you know they are going to tell you this then laugh all the way home. Then get home and tell their partner.. and laugh some more.

A very wise mother of three told me not to stock up on nappies but instead on wine. Now THIS is good advice from one mum to another. And even better.. I listened.. and now know that a wine a day keeps the straightjacket away.

In truth though, being a mother of three has already brought me the most amazing gifts (on top of the gift of three beautiful individual girls).

- My love for my children has become deeper, and richer again.

- My appreciation and love for my parents, my in-laws and my friends has grown again. We have the most amazing village who look after us.

- My husband has become my best friend again. I miss him all day while he is at work. I can't wait until the weekend when we will get to spend time together. We feel more like partners than ever before because boy do we need each other! (feel free to gag here)

- My world has become small again. But in a precious way that I know is only temporary. And I am going to do my best to remember that.

- I am satisfied by my family. This might sound weird. But I am an extrovert.. I always want to invite more people to hang out with us. But I have had breathtakingly simple moments... us all in the lounge playing duplo before bed, a trip to the botanic gardens.... where I have felt so surrounded in love and joy by 'just us' that I wouldn't have wanted anyone else there.

- The song 'Clementine' (see below) that I wrote in the middle of the most intense time after having her. A way to express all the love I had for her that felt like too much to contain.

Having three children is WONDERFUL yes, but by gosh golly it is not easy.

And I'm only three weeks in.

Gulp.








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After taking a sweet little break to welcome our darlings Clementine and Sasha we are happy to announce we are

back in action with 'Bespoke Songs'


What a better way to celebrate it with a give away


If you want to win your very own family bespoke song:

like our page facebook page and like the post


DOUBLE YOUR CHANCE by entering the competition on Instagram by following us
Winner will be drawn on Thursday the 27th of July




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It was mercy at the sun that brought you into our arms
when the worrying was done, and we saw you
Now I'm looking at your face, and you're safe in our embrace
and my every coming day is for you

Oh my darling Clementine

So now all of me has changed, I will never be the same
Every birth has rearranged and grown me
You were always meant to be in this funny family
My little girls 1, 2, 3.. you complete me

Oh my darling Clementine




Hello!

Yes I am on the other side of child birth! *cue fireworks* .... *actually no... don't wake the baby*

We welcomed our BEAUTIFUL daughter Clementine Dawn Bush into the world on the 4th of July ('goodbye to my independence' day) at 7.34am.





My pregnancy had been a stressful one with some complications along the way so it was the most amazing relief and joy to receive a perfectly healthy 8.10lb baby girl into our arms. Words can't express how grateful we are.

Surprise!

We didn't know what we were having but having a third girl feels so perfect and right for our family. We couldn't be happier! Clementine means 'Mercy' and Dawn of course means 'Daybreak' and truly, her arrival felt like merciful daybreak to us! So her name is so precious.

I LOVED not knowing our baby's gender for this pregnancy. It gave me something to focus on through all of the worrying... excitement right up until the very end. I know many women like to know the gender so they can bond with their baby in the womb, but after doing it both ways I know for me the bond is no stronger from knowing. I found out with our second so it has been so great that I have got to experience both ways.

Pre Labour Holiday in Hospital

So being our third child, my husband and I didn't manage to make time to get away just the two of us before Clementine was born.
However, because I was being induced, the fates aligned and I got to spend a whole day in hospital. By myself.
No children.
Just me.
And a book.
And TV.
And delicious snacks (thanks to a fabulous friend bringing me a goody bag).
I didn't start labouring until 10ish at night. So I had a whole pain free day of mooching.
IT. WAS. BLISS.
It is seriously funny how your standards of a good time plummet remarkably after having children. I was honestly having a joy explosion most of the day that was way out of proportion for my current circumstance. It's not like I had a plush room and a gourmet menu... Just Bravo Tv and Caramilk... but you would think I was at a five star retreat.
I am actually so grateful for my new standards of what is a treat. Because it makes it so easy to be grateful. So easy to find joy. And so easy have perspective. (But only when I am alone, or just ONE person is talking to me at a time).

Sidenote- One time I walked into the Northlands Mall bathroom and caught myself having the thought (simply because I was so pregnant and it is quite spacious) "oh wow this is nice"... WHAT?!?! What is wrong with me! I think I need to get my standards up a liiiiiitle bit more than that.

Labour and birth

*Shudder*
Do you know what the really good news is about my labour and birth? IT WAS MY LAST! Can I get a 'Woop Woop'! Throw your hands up in the air party people because I never have to do that again!

I always wondered if I would ever have it, but its the most wonderful feeling to know my family is complete... we are all here. After Sadie I always felt like "I wonder who we would miss out on if we didn't try for one more" feeling. And I'm pretty sure it was a strong fear of my husband that I would have that feeling forever no matter how many children we squeezed into our 3 bedroom house.
But Hallelujah! The feeling is beautiful and I am so so grateful to know it. It's not something I take for granted.

Let's just say I did not have a fun time with this labour and birth. I laboured through the night and pushed for a long time way too early. I felt completely lost and out of control for the last couple of hours. The words "help me" were screamed... a lot. A lot. She was born posterior and I had to birth on my back because I had injured my knee falling over the weekend before (another dramatic story for another time).

But.
Here we are.
Both Clementine and I.
And the trauma is fading. (yes I am a drama queen).

Midwife and Hubby

My midwife is amazing! and wonderful! and I have had fantastic support through my pregnancy, birth and now in the weeks to follow I have been so well supported.
Midwives work so flippin ridiculously hard! I am in awe of everyone in this profession.

I also want to give props to my amazing husband.
Heavily pregnant and with impending pain before me I didn't give him enough credit... okay okay I was worse than that.. I actually told him he wasn't allowed to have any feelings until after the baby was born "Can you please just focus on me for this last week... it just needs to be about me"... sliiiight diva moment in hindsight. Felt fully justified at the time.
But I felt his relief just as intensely as mine the moment Clementine was born. And in that moment I realised just how stressful these nine months and then especially those last hours have been for him. Because while we both worried about this precious baby. I felt her move within me, and he didn't. I saw eight or so scans of her growing well, he saw half of those while he missed the others due to work. He didn't have the constant reassurance I had. And he loved this baby just as much.
I also think about while yes OF COURSE FOR SURE it is MUCH HARDER being the woman who has to carry this giant watermelon and give birth to it, watching the person you love go through it is still a stressful and emotional weight to carry.  So okay okay menfolk...you ain't half bad. I see you. I appreciate you. I especially love my one. He is the hero of our family. (after me).



There is more to this story ... Clementine is now just over a week old and it's been a hard beautiful week. But for now I'm going to go and cuddle my baby girl while simultaneously trying to meet my other two girls endless needs. Easy.

(P.s. I have the most amazing family, and family in law, and friends... I don't know HOW anyone does this without the incredible support I do.. to all my Whanau... THANK YOU SO MUCH)












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It's been over three months since Sasha was born. Wow time goes fast
I though I would just share my very own experience of being a mum of a new born baby
"Oh Mummy! You are beeeeeeautiful this morning" Mathou, Crayon D'Humour


I love the newborn stage, those cuddles, those special noises that they make, those ga goooo ge aa conversations, the smiles... THE SMILES aaaaaaah. You just want to squeeze and give a tsunami of kisses.

But man this is still a really challenging time.



What I found the hardest is the lack of consistency, there is always something that will come up and ruin the schedule that reassure's us all.
This schedule that has become the Holy Grail for every parent.

I have been thinking, perhaps if we spent less time worrying about setting a routine for our babies, and instead let them find their own consistent rhythm... life would be less overwhelming. And over the coming months (cough, years) their lives and routines will be in harmony with our own. (sounds good doesn't it).

Let's crunch the numbers shall we?
If life with a baby were an equation...in my experience...the numbers would look like this:


The first few weeks:  40% of consistence and 60% of a complete What The Heck Is Going On!!
Passing 6 weeks:  60%  consistent and 40% of WTHIGO
and so on...until you get a very laid back 90% consistent and 10%  of WTHIGO (although I have heard this all goes back to the start in the teen years)


Here are some few things that have helped my wee family to survive through the WTHIGO

  • Co sleeping and man this is sooo good!!
  • Having to organise the day:I am not a organise person AT ALL. Now without it our days would be a disaster!! Joseph needs a sleep in the morning, when I say need, he is putting himself to bed pretty much everyday (that is pretty gold, but please note that I have done nothing for it, it is all him!) Therefore mornings are pretty chilled at home. And if by miracle Sasha has also chosen to sleep at the same time- victory!- I can make a decent kind of dinner . Let’s say that 5 o’clock is the time when everyone cries, EVERYONE.
  • Using a baby carrier, Sasha just won’t stay alone, who would? this helps us to get things done. 
  • WHITE NOISE or WOMB NOISE are magic!!!! 
  • Having people helping to look after Joseph
  • Not being too hard on ourselves. There will be days (maybe a lot) where you feel that everything is falling apart, when you have a 100% of WTHIGO. In those days, despite the “experts”,  I would put something on TV and have Joseph to JUST CALM DOWN so I can breastfeed in peace!!!!!! by the way who are those experts dictating us what to do, do they even have kids??? haha!

And take time to notice and remind yourself there are rewards everyday:
the smiles, the cuddles all those moments that would become our children's childhood memories
"Children have some super powers"

And of course- I am only an expert on my own children, and not an expert on parenting..so I would love to hear from you!
What is or was really helpful for you during this season?
"Life is full of small happines" 


xx Emma
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Michal :

Following on from my blogpost How to enjoy the last two weeks of pregnancy...when you already have children! I have been attempting to tick some of the items from my pre baby bucket list.
Yesterday it was creating a playlist to labour along to.

I think you have to be in the right mood to do this! I had thought about doing a few times over the previous days and it had seemed like a chore. However when I sat down yesterday afternoon it was extremely therapeutic and fun. (Most likely aided by the fact that my outrageously wonderful friend was making my family dinner while our kids watched a movie!).

It's kind of a bizarre playlist to make, because unlike a playlist for a dinner party or car trip... upon listening I will be in various stages of hideous pain. So I have to think to myself, what would I like to listen to while moaning like an animal and re-thinking the life choices that lead me to such events?

If you glance at my playlist..the answer seems to be... beautiful music with depressing lyrics.
Ah, perfect.
Really I think that could be summed up as one of my favourite genre's of music on any given day. However I did go back and remove a couple of tracks upon rethinking.. namely Sufjan Stevens track 'Fourth of July' which repeats the lyrics "we're all gonna die".... hmmm maybe not the MOST appropriate.... however if you are in a different situation- I highly recommend this song.

So now my playlist is ready to go! Knowing myself I will love it in early stages of labour, then later on will be throwing things at the stereo (and my husband) in harrased state of unfocused rage in order to get some silence.

My playlist features artists Sufjan Stevens, Bon Iver, The National, Gungor, Ben Folds, The Nashville Cast (who watches this!?!?!?!? so good!!!), Ed Sheeran, Ray LaMontagne, Coldplay (the early years...of course), Iron & Wine and Elbow.

I can't wait to listen to it.


Emma:

I had playlists ready for both my son’s birth and both have been a sightly different experience. For Joseph I chose music that have been very special all through my childhood. I guess it was a way to turn a page and to tell myself “it is time to become a mum now’ eeeek! At the beginning, the music helped to distract me between contractions. I was singing along, doing some pelvic movements and was thinking to myself “okay I can handle these pains, I can do it!". Unfortunately, as things progressed and the pain was getting unbearable, I was just stunned and shocked about the whole thing, I needed a quiet time to concentrate, so we stopped the music. Because I ended up at the hospital I didn’t have time to take the playlist with me so I had no music when I was holding Joseph. For Sasha’s birth I made a new set list .
This time I wanted music that inspires me . I purposely chose a short playlist because I wanted to just listen the same songs over and over. I was in a very different place for this birth, less stunned I guess. I knew what I was going for and at the time of the last contractions the song I need thee was being played. I thought that was pretty cool! What a bliss it was to hold your baby with some inspiring music, it was like a movie scene haha.
Those songs will always carry something very special. Overall, music has helped me to feel stronger, to stay focus at some stage and to give magic to the moment. Music has this incredible capacity to enhance every stage and moment of our life. Some artist I chose: Ben Howard, Sufjan Stevens, Bon Iver, Charlie Cunningham, Tigran Hamasyan, Jose Gonzales, Bobo Stenson…


_________________________________________________________________________________

So what has been your experience with music in relation to labour and birth? Let us know your recommended songs to birth to!

x Michal and Emma
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Ways to 'enjoy' the last two weeks of pregnancy..... when you already have children!





Last night I thought I was going to go into labour.
Hallelujah! I thought, let's get this show on the road! But alas I have woken up today sans baby just a delightful sprinkle of minor cramping and a resentment that I should even have to get dressed. Boo!

I am 38 weeks pregnant. Which basically means I have reached that point in pregnancy where I have unfounded yet relentless hope that the baby might come "any day now" even though due date is still two weeks away. It's like every pregnant woman (that I have talked to) lives in an absolute place of denial that they will go full term... and don't even say the word "overdue" ... that is CLEARLY not an option.

Last night in between urging my waters to break like in the movies and googling "signs you are in early stages of labour" (it's as if I truly believe if I read in print whatever current symptoms I am experiencing.. are in fact labour!...then my body will believe me and go along with it)... anyway in between all of that I got to thinking about how once again I am wishing weeks of my life away.

I seem to fall into this trap so easily! Over and over and over again! Gah!
Why is it so hard for me to be present in the moment, in the current day, in my pregnant state- cherishing this time before life goes crazy with a newborn and two under 5 year olds, before my nipples feel like they are on fire 24/7 and my hair doesn't get brushed for a month??!

How can I retrain my mind to not only 'see' but FEEL the beauty and uniqueness of this time right now?
These last two weeks of my life I will spend pregnant.
These last two weeks of just having two daughters to say good night and good morning to (and everything in between).
These last two weeks of feeling life move inside me. Of knowing, yet not knowing at all the person about to join our family.

When it is your first pregnancy, everyone tells you to "enjoy this time now before everything changes".. first time mums to be are encouraged to put their feet up and watch tv, read books, go for lovely walks, pamper themselves, date their husbands/partners. Oh doesn't it sound blissful.
Funnily enough no one is suggesting such things to this mother of two. Good thing as well.... or someone might get hurt.
Probably the most frequent exchange is "can you nap?" to which I reply "no". Conversation over.

So... I decided in the night... today I would make a list of things that I could feel excited about doing before the baby comes. And therefore trick my brain into thinking 'oh golly gosh I hope the baby DOESN'T come today... or I wouldn't get to clean my skirting boards'.... (yeeeeah nah... I have never been one to 'nest'.. much to my mothers dismay).

But here is my list of thoughts and ideas.. of ways to spend time and things to do BEFORE baby #3 joins our family.
I thought I would share them here in case there are any other mums on their second, third or tenth time around in the same state of mild desperation as me.
I tried to google to help me cheat on this list and I couldn't find ANYTHING HELPFUL... about ways to enjoy your last weeks of pregnancy when you already have children. I'm feeling VERY neglected by the world wide web right now.


The Final Countdown

- write a letter to each of my daughters before they welcome a new sibling and tuck it away for them to receive when they are older. (I actually keep a private blog for each of the girls I will give them the link to when they turn 18.. or 21... or a random rainy day)

- make a playlist of music that I love to play either a) during labour or b) around the house when baby comes home

- have a one on one 'date' with each of my girls to chat about the upcoming changes.

- make 'birthday cards' for the new baby with the girls

- put in a bit more effort than normal to take some half decent 'bump' photos... after all after this I will be forever thin.. like model thin... people won't BELIEVE I was ever pregnant. (please read my sarcastic tone...)

- wear clothes with incredibly difficult breast access...

- clock off as soon as my husband gets home everyday ... as in IMMEDIATELY jump in the bath then watch netflix. And feel no guilt. None. Nada.

- wash hair, shave legs, generally stay in a clean, hairless state.

- Do practical things.. like make a list of important information for whoever is looking after the girls, try and catch up on the washing, sort out the girls clothes drawers and wardrobe... blah blah blah.

- go for a massage, pedicure, manicure, weekend long pampering session at these mysterious 'day spas' they speak of in movies. Reality: pick one! If you are lucky. And there is room on the credit card.

- online 'window shop' and email a variety of "push presents" you would like to receive to your spouse/partner... hey... dreams are free people, dreams are free. I imagine my husband would MOST enjoy these drip fed over the coming days.. the more extravagant the better..then I will throw in one realistic looking one.... that's right... I'm a thinker.


...... okay that's all I have for now... and clearly I was scraping the barrel by the end.



But that's a good start I think! I would LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE to hear your ideas to add to this list! Because google doesn't care. But I do! and will add your ideas to this list.

xx Michal



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What's your story? 

I am 40 years old now, my children are 14,12 and 10 years old. We live in a small town on the swedish westcoast. Close to the forest, beaches and rocks. I love to be outdoor, running, sailing and winterbathing. And I bring my kids to many of my activities. Even though it's only one of them that likes the winterbathing. I also love music and books and I have tried to introduce my kids to that wonderful world. But the most important thing is my faith. I want my kids to have a faith in God and to rest in his love

What have your children taught you?

My children have taught me that life moves on so quickly. You have got to seize the moment. They grow up so fast.... They have taught me a lot about unconditional love, also about the way God loves me as his child. 

What is your advice for other parents/new parents?

My advice is to think about the future, when your kids are grown up. What do you NOT want to regret. it's wise to think about that now before it's too late. Now you have the perfect moment to be the parent that you will remember without regrets. (And of course, none of us is perfect).

What's on your mind?

I am thinking a lot about creating happy childhood memories for my children.

What's your favourite thing to do or place to go with your children?

I love being outdoor with my kids. We love the beach!

What is your favourite child related item all parents should rush out and buy 20 of?

I love clothes that are made to be sunproof. (Sunprotection)

What are you listening to at the moment? (music)

I am listening to all kind of pop music.
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Siu Ki Holeva Williams-Lemi- Loopy Tunes Mama of 3!

What's your story?
I am a 33 year old mother of 3 cheeky monkeys – Vaiuli (7), Massey (6) and ‘Ilaisaane (2 next week). I am of Tongan, Māori, Chinese, Tahitian descent and I’m married to a Samoan (We’re a fruit salad family) I work for the Methodist Church of NZ as the Central south island children and youth ministries coordinator and also co-run Loopy tunes preschool music groups. I play saxophone and clarinet (Which are by far the most superior of all instruments ) and love life in general!

What have your children taught you?
My kids have taught me that for some reason you are not as patient or tolerant of the ones you love as you wish you could be!!! I’ve also learnt the importance of just taking time to embrace every moment because they grow up WAY too fast!!! And lastly I’ve learnt that Poo’s, wee’s and farts are just a part of my life now!!!

What is your parenting 'mantra'?
In the words of Elsa…LET IT GO!!! The house is a mess…let it go…the kids haven’t showered in 4 days…let it go…my daughter has just ripped all our lace curtains and covered herself in crème…LET IT GO!!! There are some things you just have to be like Elsa and let it go ‘cos if you don’t you will get those grey hairs way too early and not take time to just embrace this stage of life and all the highs and lows that it brings!

What's on your mind?
Right now…I really hope my husband cooks dinner…why is my son walking around in his undies…I have a meeting tonight I haven’t even planned for…my feet are cold…I feel like hot scones…I should stop my daughter from hitting the heater with a ninja turtle sword…

What's your favourite thing to do or place to go with your children?
Well we invested in the Tram and Gondola family pass $139 unlimited rides for a year!!! The best investment especially on those days when you have no money and no energy…Jump on the gondola! You can even use them as rewards!!! The tram is awesome too as my kids LOVE Margaret mahy, imagination station and the museum which are all on the tram line!!! And bonus you get to see the Chch rebuild up close. Definitely worth investing in!

What is your favourite child related item all parents should rush out and buy 20 of?
I don’t think I’d ever buy 20 of anything…Ooooo unless it was chocolate…or wine!!! But I’d have to say join up at a toy library! They’re great – borrow the toys (For next to nothing) then give them back! And you can test out those annoying noisy toys that you’d never wanna waste your money on! My boys love getting the board games out, again a chance to try before you buy. We love the toy library also good for birthday partys – grab a few mini slides – ride on toys – mini roller coasters! WAY cheaper than chipmunks!!!

What are you listening to at the moment?
My three children playing wrestling war ninjas! (My girls is going to be a tomboy!) but music wise – Moana – I know every song now! And my favourite spotify playlists are Aaradhna-Brown girl and Ladies of Jazz!!!



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Emma sent me through this blog post today about 'babymooning', and it has really caught my attention. 

http://www.practisingsimplicity.com/how-to-plan-a-babymoon/

I had, like this article references, always thought of a 'babymoon' as the weekend or week away you sneak in before the baby is born. And I have been lamenting the fact that it is looking highly doubtful we will be able to fit one in before baby #3 arrives. WOE IS ME.

But reading about this concept of bunkering down for a few weeks after the baby is born, to bond and heal and devote yourself to family, to minimise visitors and the expectations of the world outside the home... it has really struck a chord with me. 

I am not a natural homebody. My own mother has been known to say I am not a real 'stay at home mum' because I leave the house too much. (yes, heated words followed haha). But it's true in a sense that I don't relish on lazy days spent at home but prefer to be out in the world, where the people are!
But I am trying to learn to be more content in my own home, amongst the domestic duties and mundane parenting tasks, taking more time to notice the beautiful moments of this stage of life - book reading, tickling, cuddles and kisses and chats- before it's five years from now and all of my children are at school. I was looking at the school uniform we will be soon purchasing for our almost five year old and it really hit home how fast the years have gone (despite how long the days).

Emma and I chatted today about how we want to be more present in these years and have a sense of peace that the time for 'more' will come. It is so much easier said than done and I cringe when I hear myself tell people I am 'just mainly being a mum' when they ask what I am up to right now. Truly there is no 'just' about it. In the last five years I have created THREE HUMAN BEINGS (one soon to arrive..but still!) and am pouring myself into providing them with the best foundation possible for their entire lives to be built on, while still growing myself, learning more about my own passions and dreams and identity, and attempting somewhere in the mix to be a great partner to my husband, a loving daughter, a caring friend, a compassionate and kind citizen of the world. (excuse me while I have a little lie down).

So in saying all this, I wonder, is a 'babymoon' possible after the birth of a third child? 
There will be Kindy drop offs and pick ups and inevitable trips to the park for a restless two year old BUT perhaps I can make our world a bit smaller for a few weeks, say no to more visitors for a few weeks, say yes to more offers of help for a few weeks and focus on making a warm quietened cacoon for the baby, my girls, hubby and myself to snuggle up into for a short period. 

After Harper I beautifully babymooned for a couple of weeks, supported by our amazing Church community, friends and family. After Sadie, I had all the same support but I was restless and anxious to stay 'the same' for Harper that I now realise I tried to get back to 'normal' much too quickly. 

I'm going to spend these last weeks of pregnancy with intention preparing for a babymoon with this new love of my life. I'll keep you posted as the journey unfolds. 

I would love to hear how you have spent the first weeks following the birth of your children? What did you love, what would you love to try differently?

x Michal





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What's your story? I'm a 23 year old wife, mother to one (a 15 month old girl, Adeline) and a (very part time!) veterinary nurse. What have your children taught you? In my short time in being a Mumma, Adeline has taught me to not sweat the small stuff and to stop and smell the roses (literally too!). I've also come to appreciate all that my parents have done and do for me even more now that I'm a parent. What is your parenting 'mantra'? "Each to their own" You do you girlfriend! What's on your mind? Should I be saying something profound here??Because right now it's what on earth can I be bothered making for dinner and my very tired wee rascal shouldn't still be awake! What's your favourite thing to do or place to go with your children? I love drinking a good coffee or going out for breakfast on a crisp but blue skied and sunny day with my family. We also love going to the farmers market or lately to the amazing Margaret Mahy Playground. What is your favourite child related item all parents should rush out and buy 20 of?
Books! I absolutely adore sitting down and reading and looking at beautiful illustrations with Adeline even if it only last a couple of minutes! What are you listening to at the moment? Trollz and Moana soundtrack because let's be honest who really runs the house when theres a toddler living in it! But MY go to is the old 2008 Hillsong worship album "this is our God", also I'm really enjoying Harry Styles new album (who would've thought), can't go past a good dance song from the top 40 and of course PMB!! And yes my baby is still awake well past her bed time.... don't sweat the small stuff right?!
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Alicia.

What's your story?

I am a married stay at home mama of 5!
4 planned and 1 wee surprise (or epic fail)!
Our eldest has just turned 10 (that's 3650 sleepless nights) and our youngest is 10 months! Our first three are all boys and then we had a wee girl. We joke she was the icing on the cake and now we have the cherry too!
What have your children taught you?


Taught me to be humble!

We are raising these individual wee humans with different personalities and temperaments all going through different ages and stages. We have this ideal of what a good mama looks like the reality is there is more than one person involved in this parenting business. There is so much out of our control and I am learning more about myself everyday...some I'm proud of some not so much. 
What is your parenting advice?

Just when you think you've got it sorted you don't! My husband and I often joke that we should publish a book with that one piece of advice for new parents. 

It's like when you think your wee poppet is sleeping through the night and then a tooth arrives! Or you think they are amazing eaters and then they get poorly!
What's on your mind?

Recently I have been thinking about how important it is to be real with each other. It's really tiring trying to be something you are not. It would be do nice if we could just celebrate our differences because that's how God has created us to be. We all have strengths and weaknesses and we are designed to do this crazy life together not to critique one another. You are an amazing mama just the way you are and thankfully we are all a work in progress!

What's your favourite thing to do or place to go with your children?

Our favourite family hang out has got to be the river...we definitely don't get there enough but we love when we do. It's just such a nice place to simply BE...and enjoy being together. Our go to picnic is plastic cheese, ham and chips on some good old white bread rolls!

It's all about creating memories to last a lifetime!

What is your favourite child related item all parents should rush out and buy 20 of?

My favourite baby must have is a merino kids gogo bag...we love them! I'm just trying to justify a new one for Otis. It would be so good to have spare for the days the wets through or worse! I am loving the look of the sherpa one especially on these chilly Canterbury evenings! 
What are you listening to at the moment?

At the moment ALL I listen too is whatever my children are listening too...so you could say it's quite eclectic!







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Maggy (Emma's Mum)

What's your story?


I am a French mother of 6 , grand-mother of 9 , retired from Air-France airline , My principal occupation now is baking and cooking for my family and friends, and restaure an old 18 century house in the middle of Cognac vineyards.

What have your children taught you?


As the eldest of 7 to have a big family made sense to me, each baby I had was a gift , I was 20 years old for the 1st and 40 for the last , so learning was my topic ! learning patience, surrender, confidence specially when you have a baby covered in eczema and which treatment meant hours in the bath. ..!

What is your parenting advice?

I had learnt from my mistakes, and my conclusion is never try to be THE perfect mother, My love and my instinct lead me, no sophisticated book or new method about parenting ! I took from my mother and grand-mother and made it my own.


What's on your mind?

Now I think how to help my children and great children as well as I can ! children are for life !

What's your favourite thing to do or place to go with your children?

We loved each winter to go to the Pyrénées to ski or just having fun, now with my grand-children we love to go to the rope park and baking


What is your favourite child related item all parents should rush out and buy 20 of?

I recommend instead of pacifier Petite music box CD ...20 of them !! at home, in the car , for a nap or calm an evening sorrow .

What are you listening to at the moment?

At the moment church bells, horns and children shouts from the avenue of my son's flat in Paris ! 18 century classic and baroque music when I bake or cook Christian songs , Jazz and Didier Squiban a Breton composer in my car....





Vicki (Michal's Mum)


What's your story?

I have been married to the love of my Life Tony for 34 years. We have two children, our daughter Michal and son Andrew. We have a wonderful son-in-law Matthew whom we love having in our lives and Andrews partner Eva who is a ray of sunshine. Michal and Matthew have given us the wonderful gift of two Granddaughters Harper and Sadie and an eagerly awaited wee baby in a few weeks who already has a place in our hearts.

My Mother has Alzheimer’s who I am slowly losing week by week as I become a stranger to her, so daily visits to her have become precious as every goodbye maybe her last to me knowing I’m her daughter. My hope is that she will still allow me to hug and cuddle her and tell her I love her.
As 60 approaches I count my blessings which is Family

What have your children taught you?


My children have taught me over the years from when they were babies to now as adults. They have taught me patience and forgiveness and trust. How to be grateful and how to negotiate, how to love unconditionally and how to feel loved. How to smile when all you want to do is cry. I think we can always continue to learn from and respect each other.
What is your parenting mantra?

Bed, bath, tea (not me, the children) always routine.

What's on your mind?

My Mother and My daughter. 


What's your favourite thing to do or place to go with your children?

Sounds a bit ‘All about me’ but coffee and Fluffys with Harper and Sadie. They are so well behaved and a joy to hang with. Harper and I go to ‘Ballantynes for morning tea and we make it a very girly outing, raising pinkie fingers and calling each other ‘Darling”. We love it. Ask Harper. She even curtseys when we walk in the Ballantynes doors. I don’t!

Also one on one time with my children, always special.

What is your favourite child related item all parents should rush out and buy 20 of?

photo frames and albums ( not usb sticks) to hold all your memories because your babies will grow up in a heartbeat and if you are blessed with grandchildren you get to fill more frames and do it all over again.

What are you listening to at the moment?

I’ve discovered Spotify so I play whatever my mood feels like and I listen to late night talk back’ ( don’t mock) when I can’t sleep because I am thinking about  Family.


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